I recently volunteered at one of my boyfriends alumni activities. I asked him to put me on an activity one of my two friends would be running. He texts me and tells me to go down to the dinning hall to help out with the caramel apples, which my friend was running. When I get there I notice another girl helping her, but I didn’t see her face, so I went straight to my friend, ignoring this unknown person. Imagine my surprise when this person isn’t so unknown, but my boyfriends first girlfriend.
I know it is her, because more than a year ago we had a huge argument about her volunteering. She was volunteering and then they were going out to dinner. What caused the argument was the fact that he kept referring to her as his ex-girlfriend, insisted we would get along, but never invited me to join them for dinner. Once each side had express themselves and things were settled, it was clear that they were just friends and that my boyfriend is a dummy. He kept referring to her as his ex, when they had dated for a millisecond when they were like seventeen. We are close to our thirties, no guy I dated in high school would ever be referred to as an ex, that’s child’s play. Once I understood the depth of their relationship or lack of and he understood my perspective, it turned out that she is actually a pretty nice person.
I have gotten a chance to hang out with her a couple of times now, even one on one, and we get along well. We could have probably been friends on our own accord. So having to volunteer next to her was nothing out of the ordinary. It just occurs to me that not many people would be as cordial. Not many people would decide to assign their ex and current love interest to work together. Which makes me wonder if my boyfriend would be so oblivious as to do this if I had stated hatred towards her. I wonder if he even thinks about these things, which I would bet is a big fat NO. I know for a fact that my boyfriend doesn’t pay much attention to people interactions, so if I did hate her, I would have to clearly state it.
This makes me think about our relationship. I think it’s good that we have the type of relationship were we are not jealous freaks of each other. I don’t know if my boyfriends oblivion is good or bad. I think it’s both, just like my habit of hyper analyzing things. Like the granny smith apples we were dipping into caramel, bitter and sweet.